Earlier this season on Grey's Anatomy, Meredith Grey's closing comments on one episode spoke so directly to me and my situation that I had to replay it until I could transcribe them:
We do get to decide how we're going to live.
So do it...decide.
Is this the life you want to live?
Is this the person you want to love?
Is this the best you can be?
Can you be stronger? Kinder? More compassionate?
The waiting can kill you.
You make a decision and then the world has to turn.
The consequences unfold out of your hands.
There's only one thing that seems clear in those quiet moments while you wait.
Whatever you chose was wrong.
I wrote them down and put them away and forgot about them until I happened across them this week, as I wait to see if we can come to agreement and the house will be sold. Yesterday, as I put my initials on the final counteroffer, I made my decision and now, the world has to turn.